in Uncategorized

corns

As you all know, the wife and I have been hippying it up in the yard with a big earthy garden for the last few weeks. Here’s a couple shots of the composterator.

You go stand in the woods because you stink:

Ingredients: One lawn and one onion.

Now, about this corn I keep talking about. A week or so ago, I noticed a stark difference between the wife’s garden and my garden. We don’t actually have separate gardens. Gia came home one day and planted a bunch of stuff in one of the planter boxes. I thought it looked neat and announced that I was going to do something cool with the other box. Below is what we have currently.

Gia:

Tony:

As you can see, she has Cilantro, Basil, Sage, Thyme, Lettuce, Broccoli, Green Onions, and Red Bell Peppers, whereas I have dirt where some ants used to live before I killed the shit out of them.

In an attempt to even things out, I planted some corn from seeds two weekends ago. I planted Breeders Bicolor (White and Yellow) and some of that freaky Indian Rainbow Corn.

Bicolor:

Polycolor:

Everything I read said to plan seeds 8-12 inches apart in rows that are about 36 inches apart. That’s great if you have an acre to dedicate to corn. I planted seeds about every 4 inches in four rows that are about 12 inches apart. It’s going to be crowded! Actually, once all the seeds sprout, I’ll probably thin them out. Which brings me to my next point. Check this shit out:

I AM FARMER!! HEAR ME … STAND SILENTLY AND STARE AT PLANTS FOR HOURS!!

  1. At least you get part of the garden. I got to till it, frame it, fence it, and stay the hell out of it. But they may be by choice. I have enough to deal with having this monsterous yard and a highly volatile group of militant weeds using some form of guerilla turf warfare.

    But, the clover is turning alovely shade of yellow and continually wilting. I win.

    Make sure you offer some corn to any wayward Pilgrims that happen upon your lawn.

  2. I will offer my corn as a projectile deterrent to travellers along with warming salutations such as, “Stay the hell away from my lawn!” and “Go back to Ireland, Mickey McMickerson!”

    Turf warfare. Ha. I get it.

Comments are closed.